Scam SMS.... again

[adrianh]

I just love getting scammers & sales people call me up.

I got a guy the other day wanting to demo a photocopier at my place - I said cool, you come along as long as you have Debonairs & 6 beers delivered 15 minutes before you get here. If you're going to waste my time its gotta be worth my while.

A girl tried to sell me a cell phone on contract. We talked at great length until I started asking her about the quality of the camera. I wanted to know whether the colour would be good if I took a photo of my butt. That was the end of that conversation.

An Indian girl tried to sell me a cellphone contract. I asked her where she lived and she said Durban. I asked her if you could organize me a set of mags and a car radio if I take the phone - she giggled and said she couldn't help me.

A girl tried to sell me printer cartridges. I told her we don't have printers because we run a brothel and we don't need such things. We talked about this for a bit and I told her that I am stinking rich and that I drive a big Merc and have a holiday home etc. She ended up asking me for a job as my PA

An Edgars lady tried to give me a credit card, I asked her what colour the card is and she said that it is red. I explained to her in great detail that red is not my colour and that it has to be blue. We argued about this matter for a while until she tolk me that if I wanted a ffing blue card that I should go to Standard Bank.

A holiday salesman tried to sell me a holiday. I asked him if I could put it on my credit card and if he would show it as golf membership because I don't want my wife to know that I am taking my girlfriend - he was happy to oblige.

Then there was an ADT guy that tried to sell me their services. I told him that I got an AK47 and that I will fix up anybody that sticks his head through my window. I told him that I wanted upgrade to an R5 and asked him what he thinks. We had a great discussion about the merits of an R5 vs AK47.

A insurance agent theid to sell me a medical policy. I told him that I am a waiter and that I have one missing leg - he would ensure me. I then told him that we drink heavily at work and that we tend to fall down a lot - he would still ensure me. I told him that I lost an eye when I fell down the last time - he would still ensure me. Then I told him that we get very sloshed on Saturdays and go sky diving, this is when I lost my arm - he didn't want to ensure me anymore.


...and many more..
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I love to see how people react when you don't give them the answers they expect. Some get very angry, some go quiet, but the really good salesmen still try and they try to work around the nonsense that I speak. Its good for me because I become better at speaking crap with a straight face and its good for them because it teaches them how to deal with aholes..