Child Maintenance advice

[HopeOnline]

One of my friends needs advice:

"hi I need some advise, my husband divorced his first wife, he has two kids with her (both 8 years old), they stay by her but she is never home and leaves them with granny, she says in the house and he pays her rent to keep the kids safe and close to him and his parents. he pays the school fees, medical aid, R3000 maintenance, all clothes and school clothes, any extra bills, but she will not give up. we can't get through financaily. she works but will not pay towards anything, she threatens him with court perminatly. I would like to know is it better to let her take him to court and then fight to decrease maintenance or for him to take her to court first to decrease maintenance."

Can anyone assist with some advice please
After advice has been given would it be possible for the moderator to please delete it.

Thank You

[Just Gone]

Difficult one this ...... morally and legally.

[SSS100]

I'm no legal expect, but i think he must put an end to this madness
Firstly, the kids are both theirs, so she must also contribute to the expenses...that is half of all the kids maintence or living expenses
she is working, so he must get a good lawyer to get her to pay up as well.

Maybe first point to consider is how did they agree on the current arrangement? Was it on their divorce settlement and endorsed by court? or was it him being "reasonable" at the time?

[sterne.law@gmail.com]

Maintenance is calculated based on the following:
1) the needs of, in this case, the children and
2) the ability of the payer to pay

It is not a given that one spouse must pay everything, the load should be shared in proportion to the ability of each person. (in a simple world, if a child needs R1000 per month and husband has R3000 disposable and ex wife R1000 disposable income, then the husband should pay R750 and the wife R250)

You can have the maintenance amount decreased. This revolves around calculations.
Whilst the children's welfare is important the payer also has rights and obligations. Overburdened payments could indirectly prevent a person having further children.

[Dave A]

Whilst the children's welfare is important the payer also has rights and obligations. Overburdened payments could indirectly prevent a person having further children.

Assuming the presence of "responsible adults", of course.

[claassenattorney]

It is really a bad situation for both of you and your husband. After the divorce, child custody is one of the main issues that come in front and in such cases, any one of the parents who is financially stable should take custody of the kid as long he or she is capable enough to earn own. In your case, I think no such legal procedures are carried on. Your husband’s ex-wife is just taking advantage of your husband for the sake of the kids. It is better your husband should take her to the court and file the child custody case. After that, if his ex-wife agrees to pay everything for the kids, then the kids should live with her or else your husband should take the custody of the kids. In the case, if you are not so financially strong, you have to adjust. I can suggest first, you take advice from an experienced child custody lawyer in this case.