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  1. #1
    Site Caretaker Dave A's Avatar
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    Why today is going to be a great day!

    I can't help feeling that it's getting harder and harder to find good, positive news just at the moment. So I thought maybe we need to make some up!

    What are the good news headlines you'd like to see?

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    Site Caretaker Dave A's Avatar
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    BEE scrapped.

    In a surprise move, parliament today repealed the Employment Equity Act and the Black Economic Empowerment Act.

    Chief whip for the ANC said "We read a post by {username} on The Forum SA and decided that there is no short cut to success. Placement should be done on merit if we are going to move forward as a truly united nation."

    Thabo Mbeki and Tony Leon were seen shaking hands after the passing of the resolution and in a joint statement said "We are once again the rainbow nation." Both leaders appealed for all to work together towards securing a brighter future for every citizen of our country.

    A proposal to amend the Constitution by removing the section providing for fair discrimination is expected to be tabled in parliament tomorrow.

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    Platinum Member Marq's Avatar
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    New Vice President

    In another suprise move today, following on the scrapping of BEE and all related laws and policies, Thabo Mbeke announced that the current Vice President was stepping down in favour of a more deserving candidate.

    Rumour has it that Mr Dave Alcock from The Forum SA is the favourite and most likely candidate to succeed. Mr Alcock's entomological background is the key that will promote him to this position. He will be instrumental in ensuring that he rotten bugs in the system are eradicated and has the full backing of those still left in parliment.

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    Platinum Member Marq's Avatar
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    I thought this was a magic idea and would create a great thread.

    Either we really have to drag the nets for some fun stuff on what we would like to see or it wasn't such a great idea???

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    Site Caretaker Dave A's Avatar
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    We'll promote it in the morning with an email run - I reckon this is going to be fun!!

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    just me duncan drennan's Avatar
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    In late breaking news tonight health Minister Manto Tshabalala Misimang has stepped down and appointed Zachie Achmat as her replacement. Misimang will be retiring to the country side to study here PhD in the nutritional values of the african potatoe.
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    Platinum Member Marq's Avatar
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    The Miracle cure known as Injecxion will be be rolled out weekend to all prisoners. The drug which is a simple concoction of local herbs, creates an ireversable imprint on the mind of peace and harmony while at the same time creating ongoing guilt feeling for the crimes committed. It is expected that a million prisoners will seek forgiveness in the communities by working on all municipal levels for half the minimum wage without ever going back to old habits.

    Prison staff were looking forward to converting the prisons to luxurious housing for the poor and hotel accommodation for 2010. Thereafter their roles will change to that of caretakers and hotel staff. An Intense training programme has been developed as this this is expected to take many years.

    Minister Balfour is seeking a new position in Parliment but it is more likely that he will be given a dose of the drug as well so that he can realise the errors of his ways. Apparently there is a rumour that he may be working at Ushaka and standing in for the Lenny the whale act.

    Mr Selebi chief spokesman for local organised crime noted his disappointment at the developments and is considering working for a living.

    The stress levels in police units has decreased slightly as a result of not having to deal with that much crime any more. This has been offset though with the announcement that they will be intergrated into the community to work with the ex prisoner population.

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    just me duncan drennan's Avatar
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    Vavi backs Mboweni for president

    In a surprise turn around Zwelinzima Vavi has come out in support of Tito Mboweni for president, heaping praise upon Mboweni's economic principals.

    Vavi stated, "I am excited to see the removal of strict labour regulations which will stimulate our economy and create both jobs and growth - true empowerment for the working class. I'm sure that providing employers with more freedom, both in terms of labour and free market policies will be good for everyone."

    He further added, "We will continue to fight for the rights of labour, but see our role as a regulator of labour abuse, rather than a political force or economic regulator."
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    Site Caretaker Dave A's Avatar
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    Africa now debt free.

    Two years after the launch of the "Set Africa Free" campaign, Africa is finally debt free.

    Bill Gates settled the last outstanding debts owed to the non-G8 countries who had appealed that they could not afford to cancel their loan agreements with Africa.

    The G8 sponsored initiative was originally considered unrealistic, but once the EU and the World Bank had written off their portions, the campaign gained active support from all around the world. The process was not without its controversial moments, most notably the seizure and sale of offshore assets held by political leaders identified as despots by United Nations Resolution 425/2007.

    The massive debt burden of Africa inherited from poorly implimented infrastructure development policies of the 20th century has been seen as one of the major obstacles to the continent's progress in the modern global economy.

    The fact that in terms of the settlement agreement Africa may not apply for international loans for the next five years is not seen as an obstacle to future growth. Funds previously applied to paying debt will now be channeled into improved education facilities and identified key infrastructure support programs.

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    Full Member Chris Bouwer's Avatar
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    It was also reported today that the roll-out of free housing for the poor will be commencing in January 2007.
    Only previously advantaged contractors will be used to construct these dwellings that will be fully financed by government at market related costs.

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