I'm sorry to hear you are going through a tough patch, Veroshka. May things turn for you soon.
Looking at it from the tax consultant's side, they also need to be assured that their bill will be paid too. It may be why they are just doing the basics to see this through. I expect for them to stand in a SARS queue and get it resolved pronto could have a hefty cost attached.
If you have the time, maybe if you just run backwards and forwards between SARS and your tax consultant to drive things forward. Whenever SARS raises something you're not sure of, get back to your tax consultant. It's about the only thing I can think of to speed things up without running up another bill with it.
I know it's irritating, but life can be like that at times. You just have to take the bull by the horns and wrestle as best you can. My experience is the more you apply yourself, the less resistance life gives you.
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