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Thread: 3 Sports that prove Americans are softies

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    Platinum Member pmbguy's Avatar
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    3 Sports that prove Americans are softies

    1 – Cricket turned into baseball. They discarded the hard ball because it hurt when you caught it wrong and evolved a soft bigger ball instead. They made huge gloves to catch the ball with ease. Cricket batting techniques were replaced by a single technique which is to slog at the ball. The not so World Series includes Japan – shame it was the first time they lost a war so I guess a bit of victor worship is natural.

    2 – Football: They took Rugby where the only protection came from your jersey and developed a huge padded protection suit topped off by a large solid helmet with face grills. In a team, half of the players rest while the other half plays, oh and yes, they only compete against themselves.

    3 – Last, but certainly not least, we have Basketball. It evolved from Netball, netball is played in many countries and only by woman.



    Softies

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    Don't forget war, they don't do hand to hand combat. They send autonomous drones that decide themselves when to fire their misguided missiles on women and children!

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    Diamond Member AndyD's Avatar
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    I think Americans have shyed away from cricket because they're not really interested in any sport where you can't dress up like a power ranger.
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  4. Thank given for this post:

    adrianh (24-Jul-14), CLIVE-TRIANGLE (25-Jul-14), pmbguy (24-Jul-14)

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    Gold Member Houses4Rent's Avatar
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    Who knows maybe making planes disappaer is a new sport for them. Another one went AWOL today.
    Houses4Rent
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    Bronze Member msmoorad's Avatar
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    being a muslim and all...
    i just want to say that i think baseball is a tougher, more demanding sport than cricket.

    to me, cricket is just a few notches above golf
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    Quote Originally Posted by msmoorad View Post
    being a muslim and all...
    i just want to say that i think baseball is a tougher, more demanding sport than cricket.

    to me, cricket is just a few notches above golf
    I have to agree with you and I must admit that I love Nascar and drag racing.

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    Platinum Member pmbguy's Avatar
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    The most dangerous thing about cricket it the properties of the ball. Its small and hard. This makes it difficult to hit with a bat or catch. The ball even has the potential to kill somebody. You have obviously never had to face a cricket ball at 100km an hour. The only I repeat the only "tough" thing about baseball is the slide. Chewing bubble gum or Tabaco and spitting does not make it tough. So which part is tougher again? Which part is more demanding?
    It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change. – Charles Darwin

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    Watching cricket is even worse than watching paint dry. I am asleep in the first half an hour.

    The game
    ======
    A whole lot of waiters have tea.
    When they're done they sit around for an hour then they saunter onto the pitch.
    15 minutes later one waiter runs and throws the ball at another waiter.
    The other waiter takes a swing at the ball.
    Yet another waiter (sometimes runs) but mostly saunters over to pick the ball up.
    They walk around for 5 minutes.
    The waiter who gets to throw the ball first inspects it for 5 minutes then rubs his nuts with it for another 5 minutes.
    He now spits on the ball and rubs his nuts with the ball a bit more ( as if spitting on the ball is going to stop his nuts from itching.
    He saunters a couple of meters off and spends 5 minutes deciding whether he should rub his nuts again or throw the ball.
    He runs up like a Tasmanian Devil - all you see it arms and legs and snot fly in the run.
    He comes to an abrupt halt and throws the ball at the waiter who is protecting three little stick with a 2x4
    The 2x4 plank waiter steps forward and the ball hits him on the heavily protected guard.
    Most of the waiter on the field mutter "Jolly good" and the other waiters "merely keep a stiff upper lip and mutter "poor show"
    They all break for tea and cucumber sandwiches.
    The waiters who spent the entire morning rubbing their nuts with the ball now get to inspect each others nuts and discuss the merits of spitting on the ball, spitting on the hand, or spitting on each other's nuts every 15 minutes.
    They all have a 15 minute sleep.
    Now they saunter out onto the pitch to continue their sleepy ritual.

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    Gold Member Houses4Rent's Avatar
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    AdrianH, you are miles ahead of me. You understand the rules. Maybe I should work as a waiter for a while for me to achieve that level of sophistication? I guess its easier to throw it away as I did with golf (zero interest) or rather paint some walls to watch them dry or both. The great thing about the latter is that I can change colour to make it existing again.
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    I love speed sport, my mind is simply too active to watch sport that happens in slow motion. Don't get me wrong, I think that world class cricketers a brilliant at what they do and I think that it is a great sport for those who love it, but it simply doesn't appeal to me.

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